For the families of highly publicized disasters, there is a window of time when the whole world is mourning along with you. For some, the outpouring of support and sense of community is both unexpected as it is welcomed. But often, just as suddenly as the event itself, the focus soon shifts to the next headline, and many are left with emotional shrapnel they don’t know how to heal.
In the case of plane crashes, Heidi Snow-Cinader knows firsthand what it’s like to say goodbye to a loved one before they board a flight, only to have that flight never land. Heidi’s fiancé was one of the 230 passengers and crew on board TWA Flight 800 on July 17th, 1996, when it exploded over the Atlantic shortly after takeoff from NY’s JFK airport headed to Paris.
For Heidi, the feelings that accompanied her heartbreak were difficult to talk about. It was a unique kind of grief that only those who have gone through it can truly understand. That’s why she decided to create ACCESS, AirCraft Casualty Emotional Support Services, a nonprofit group that helps surviving family members of aircraft crash victims. She wanted to provide the resources she wished she had in the aftermath of the tragedy.
Since its founding in 1996, ACCESS has trained hundreds of Volunteer Grief Mentors that provide non-political, non-denominational emotional support. These individuals have also been impacted by air disasters and are familiar with the range of emotions that accompany a traumatic event like that. ACCESS also works with airlines, first responders, and entities on the other side of disasters that interact with the families of victims, providing sensitivity training and best practices in a crisis environment.
“My goal was to create a comprehensive network that would be readily available in an instant but also serve a long-term function for the bereaved long after the disaster, knowing they had a community that understood what they were going through and were there for them,” explained Heidi.
People experience loss in every possible way. A car crash, cancer, suicide, the list is endless. None of us escape death or avoid its proximity to our lives. It is ever present, as is life. But when experienced in such an unusual way, like a plane crash, it helps to have lifelines for that grief. In the nearly thirty years since losing her fiancé, Heidi has helped countless people navigate their grief through ACCESS and prepare those that interface with them. It is not easy, but it is her purpose.
Every time there is another crash, it’s a sober reminder of what she lost, but it’s also a reminder of why she continues. “If I can help someone in that moment, which I know all-too-well, then I can help the world a little bit too,” concludes Heidi.
If you, a friend, colleague or loved one has lost someone in an aviation crash, you are not alone. You have ACCESS. Please don’t hesitate to reach out when you’re ready.
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